The Over-50 Guide to Dating
by Susie and Otto Collins, Relationship Coaches

Many of us who are over-50 wake up one morning to find that we are suddenly single again. At some point we are given the advice to "get out there and date" but we just don't know how after maybe 20 or 30 years of marriage.  As relationship coaches, we hear so many stories from middle-aged people who are unhappy with their dating experiences.  They want more from life and from their dates.  They say that they are disillusioned and some have even given up hope that they will every find a soul mate and be happy again.

Since so many people, especially those over 50, express frustration, it might seem that finding that perfect partner is hopeless.  We disagree.

Through working with many single people, many over 50, in our relationship coaching practice who want better dating experiences, we have identified six pointers for creating and having better dates.

So if you're ready, here are our five pointers:

1. Make sure that you have made completions around old relationships.  If you need to do some work around forgiving your ex, do it.  If you need to stop thinking about how things used to be with an ex before your breakup, do it.  You will not attract anyone to you who you will truly want to be with if you are still emotionally tied to someone else.

2. Don't start dating someone with the idea that you are going to have instant romance and be romantic with the person. Take the time to get to know them, establish relationship trust and connect with them as a person.  Your dating experience will be much richer if you do.

3. If you had jealousy issues in your previous relationship, you need to learn how to overcome jealousy before you begin dating.  Many people believe that the problem will fix itself if you are in a new relationship.  Wrong!  Jealousy will just keeping showing up in new relationships over and over again until it has been dealt with.

4. Put your cards on the table.  If you want a monogamous relationship, tell the person after a few dates.  In dating situations, there are often unclear expectations around infidelity and what that means.  Don't waste time.  Be clear in what you want.  There might have been divorce largely because of infidelity in past relationships so it's even more important to start a new relationship with clear agreements.

5. Know that it is possible for you to find a partner after 50.  We've done it and it's an even better, deeper relationship than we have ever had with anyone previous to this one. If you truly are open to attracting a partner to you, then you have an excellent chance that it will happen.  So search your heart to discover if you truly want to date again.

These dating tips are ones that will help you with personal growth and if you keep them in mind, you will have a better dating experience.  We are giving you this free love advice in the hopes that you will take courage and have more successful, satisfying dates and relationships in the future.